Faith, Family, Rantings, Wackadoodle

A Letter to the Younger Awkward Me

I was getting ready for my day one Saturday in February and I was thinking about how I was going to help do security at our church for a Secret Keeper Girl event that evening.  SKG is an event that’s for tween girls and their moms.  I was remembering my tween-aged years and just how awkward it was.  You see, I was a bit of an ugly duckling.  I had friends, but I had some enemies as well.  I was picked on because I was one of just a couple only children.  Like my son today, I was very confident in the fact that I was well-loved in my family circle.  I wasn’t prepared for the dog-eat-dog world of middle school.  All these thoughts came rushing back to me and I was running around the house trying to find a pen to write this letter to my tween-self.

Dear Sandy:

The first thing I want to tell you is that those kids who said you were too fat, had a big nose, were too loud, too talkative, selfish, spoiled, had hair that was too short, you looked like a boy, and whose breasts were too big, they don’t matter.  Unfortunately, they will help form who YOU think you are, but they will be wrong.

You will make many mistakes along the way and even do things that you know are wrong to try to get people to like you.  But they aren’t the people that will matter to you when you get older.  Say no to those things so that you don’t look back as an adult and shake your head, knowing that you didn’t need cave into the pressure.

No matter how awkward you feel now, how picked on, how beat down or discouraged, take heart that life WILL get better.  You find a marvelous man, who will marry you because he loves you and sees past all of the surface stuff.  He will be the light of you life and the reason for you to live such a happy life.  The two of you will have such a beautiful boy.  A child that makes your heart just overflow with love.  You’ll have the opportunity to bless others and be blessed on your job; to be God’s hands and feet.

One cool thing that will be that those people who said those things about you, they’ll become acquaintances and friends thanks to time healing those old wounds.  You’ll learn that they were hurting during those years too.  You’ll learn some dark ugly things that were going on in their lives.  The best part is, you’ll be able to forgive them.  You’ll be able to move on and live a great life.  You will grow into the beautiful woman of God that was His desire for you to be.

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. ~Jeremiah 29:11

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16 thoughts on “A Letter to the Younger Awkward Me”

  1. I LOVE the letter … Job searching has so many parallels that I could relate to your letter – “Life WILL get better, and I will find a marvelous employer and I will have the opportunity to bless others and be blessed on my job; to be God’s hands and feet.”

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  2. Sandy this letter is nice, but can I tell you that YOU that U were the most beautiful person to me when you reached out your hand and touched my heart when I was at a low point in my life . My problem back then was that I didn’t know how to ask for help or where to turn. 

    Yet despite how you must have felt among your peers— you were a role model to me, you never left me or talked bad about me as far as I knew. I saw your beauty then and it was more than skin deep.

    if only I could be more like Sandy my letter would read today. If only I had her self confidence, her smile. I had  no support system back then that will get you through anything.

    Look at you now Sandy.  You are not and never were an ugly duckling
    You are BEAUTIFUL Sandy!!

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    1. Martina, WOW! I can’t even imagine what you were thinking or feeling back then, but I know that I hurt for your struggling and suffering. I remember those days. I knew that I believed in you then as I believe in you now. Thank you so much for saying those things about me, because I felt the same way about you. I love you!

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  3. Jer 29:11 helped me through many painful years growing up. I can relate to your post.
    What an encouraging letter to write to yourself. Think I will write one to myself and maybe someday it can help my children know there is more to life than what they are experiencing at the moment.

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    1. TC, thanks so much for stopping by to read. Sometimes I think that I wasn’t ready to hear what I’m saying now when I was feeling the hurt. Keeping loving on your kids and let them know just how wonderful they are. God bless!

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    1. Thanks for stopping by, Jenny! I don’t like living in Florida for about 8 months of the year. The heat is just too much. I don’t want to go back to Connecticut, but I don’t want to stay here. Someway, perhaps, we’ll move after we retire, but good jobs, family, and a wonderful church will keep us here for now.

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  4. So love this. Oh the many things we could say to our younger selves. I loved when you reassured yourself then that things would get better. I remember at that age thinking that I would always feel that way and that nothing would ever be the same. What I realize now it that I would feel like that for a long time and then…well then…Jesus. And things were really never the same. Thanks so much for sharing! Blessings!

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    1. Thank you so much for reading, Wendy! I think about all the lies I heard about myself from other girls who were hurting too. I think about all those lies I believed. We need to teach each other to be more gentle and loving to one another. Hindsight is 20/20. 🙂 God bless!

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